Why do we cook bacon and bake cookies? #Joke

Looking for a laugh of two? Below, we have today's posting of the top 10m best jokes that we found online!

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Here is today' collection of the top ten favorite jokes of the day!


1. Little Brian,"The principal is so dumb!"
   Girl, "Do you know who I am?"
   Little Brian, "No..."
   Girl, "I am the principal's daughter!"
   Little Brian, "Do you know who I am?"
   Girl,"No..."
   Little Brian, "Good!" and walks away*


2. Got arrested at the airport last week. Apparently, security doesn't appreciate it when you call "shotgun" before boarding a plane.



3. Q: Why was there thunder and lightning in the lab?
   A: The scientists were brainstorming!



4. Q: Which weighs more, a ton of feathers or a ton of bricks?
   A: Neither, they both weigh a ton!



5. On wall in ladies room "My husband follows me everywhere..."
   Written just below it "I do not".



6. When I asked my girlfriend what she wanted for her birthday.
   She said "Just gimme something with diamonds."
   That's why I got her a pack of cards.


7. Q: What did the painter say to the wall?
   A: One more crack like that and I'll plaster you!



8. Q: What kind of key opens a banana?
   A monkey!



9. "Waiter! This coffee tastes like mud." "Yes sir, it's fresh ground."



10. Q: Why is Basketball such a messy sport?
    A: Because you dribble on the floor!
    
    
    
    For More Short Jokes

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Best Short Jokes 8

Welcome to today's best short jokes of the day. These jokes are not only short and funny but are safe for kids.


Iron Chef

1. Q: What gets wetter the more it dries?
   A: A towel.


2. Q: Why did the computer go to the doctor?
   A: Because it had a virus!


3. Q: Why did the insomniac man get arrested?
   A: He resisted a rest


4. Q: What do you call a man with no body and just a nose?
   A: Nobody nose.


5. Q: Can February March?
   A: No. But April May.


6. Q: What do lawyers wear to court?
   A: Lawsuits!


7. Q: Why did the picture go to jail?
   A: Because it was framed.


8. Q: What sound do porcupines make when they kiss?
   A: Ouch


9. Q: Why are the Iron Chefs chefs so mean?
   A: Because they beat eggs and whip cream.


10. Q: What kind of button won't unbutton?
    A: A bellybutton!


Hope you enjoy the above jokes! Thanks for dropping by!

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Short Classroom Jokes

Here are my collection (which will be updated regularly) of the best short jokes for the classroom. These are kid friendly jokes that even their teachers will find funny! Should, you have a joke to share, why not leave it in the comment section (below) Enjoy and I hope you have a few LOL's!

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TEACHER: Now, Brian, tell me frankly, do you say prayers before eating?
BRIAN: No sir, I don’t have to, my Mom is a good cook.

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TEACHER: Brian, why do you always get so dirty?
BRIAN: Well, I’m a lot closer to the ground than you are.

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TEACHER: Brian, why are you doing your math multiplication on the floor?
BRIAN: You told me to do it without using tables.

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TEACHER: George Washington not only chopped down his father’s cherry tree, but also admitted it. Now, Brian, do you know why his father didn’t punish him?
BRIAN: Because George still had the axe in his hand.

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TEACHER: Kelly, name one important thing we have today that we didn’t have ten years ago.
KELLY: Me!

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TEACHER: Brian, what do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are no longer interested?
BRIAN: A teacher.

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TEACHER: Brian, how do you spell ‘crocodile?’
BRIAN: K-R-O-K-O-D-I-A-L’
TEACHER: No, that’s wrong
BRIAN: Maybe it is wrong, but you asked me how I spell it.

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TEACHER: Kelly, go to the map and find North America
KELLY: Here it is.
TEACHER: Correct. Now class, who discovered America?
CLASS: Kelly.

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TEACHER: Brian, your composition on ‘My Dog’ Is exactly the same as your brother’s. Did you copy his?
BRIAN: No, sir. It’s the same dog.

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TEACHER: Kelly, give me a sentence starting with ‘I.’
KELLY: I is..
TEACHER: No, Kelly…… Always say, ‘I am.’
KELLY: All right…; ‘I am the ninth letter of the alphabet.’

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TEACHER: Brian, what is the chemical formula for water?
BRIAN: H I J K L M N O.
TEACHER: What are you talking about?
BRIAN: Yesterday you said it’s H to O.

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