Today's Best Short Jokes 4

Here is today's collection of the ten best short jokes! Hope you have a laugh or two or three

Work Joke
1. Q: Why did the man with one hand cross the road?
   To get to the second hand store.


2. I can't believe I got fired from the calendar factory. All I did was take a day off.


3. Q: Why did the banana go to the Doctor?
   A: Because it was not peeling well


4. Q: What kind of lights did Noah use on the Ark?
   A: Flood lights!


5. Two drunks were walking home along the railway tracks.
   The first drunk says, "There's a hell of a lot of steps here."
   The second drunk says, "I'll tell you what's worse, this hand rail is bloody low down"
   


6. Q: What's the first bet that most people make in their lives?
   A: The alpha bet


7. Q. What lies at the bottom of the ocean and twitches?
   A. A nervous wreck.


8. Q. Where do you get virgin wool from?
   A. Ugly sheep.


9. If money doesn't grow on trees why do banks have branches?


10. You should always give 100% at work
    12% Monday
    23% Tuesday
    40% Wednesday
    20% Thursday
    5% Friday

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Today's Ten Best Short Jokes 2

Short Joke and Long Joke

1. Q: Did you hear about the hungry clock?
   A: It went back four seconds.


2. There was a man who entered a local paper's pun contest.. He sent in ten different puns, in the hope that at least one of the puns would win. Unfortunately, no pun in ten did.


3. Q: What do sea monsters eat?
   A: Fish and ships


4. Police arrested two kids yesterday, one was drinking battery acid, the other was eating fireworks. They charged one - and let the other one off.


5. Q: How do you make holy water?
   A: Boil the hell out of it!


6. Q: How do you organize a space party?
   A: You planet!


7. "Dyslexic man walks into a bra"


8. Want to hear two short jokes and a long joke?
   Joke. Joke. Joooooooooooooooooooookkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkeeeeeeeeeeeee.


9. Hotel Manager: The room is $15.00 a night. But if you make your own bed, it is only $5.00.
   Guest: I'll make my own bed.
   Hotel Manager: Good. I'll get you some nails and wood.


10. Husband says; "When I'm gone you'll never find another man like me".
    Wife replied; "What makes you think I'd want another man like you!"

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Best Short Jokes 9

1. Did you hear about the new corduroy pillows?
   They’re making headlines everywhere!


2. Time flies like an arrow, fruit flies like banana.


3. Why didn’t the lifeguard save the hippie?
   Because he was too far out man!


4. Last night, I almost had a threesome, I only needed two more people!


5. What do you call a big pile of kittens?
   A meowntain.

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For More Pinterest Best Short Jokes
Best Short Jokes 3, #4, #5, #6, #7, #8

What do you call a big pile of kittens? A meowntain.

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Best Short Jokes 6

A farmer in the field with his cows counted 196 of them, but when he rounded them up he had 200.

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was a well known six offender.

What time is it when you have to go to the dentist? Tooth-hurtie.

What does a nosey pepper do? Get jalapeño business.

What is Bruce Lee’s favorite drink? Wataaaaah!

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Best Short Jokes 1, #2, #3, #4, #5


Dentist Joke

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Best Short Jokes 5

Betchat didn't know that Pampered cows produce spoiled milk?
That spoiled milk just is just one of the top five best short jokes that you will find in today's posting. Below you will find them, and I hope that you enjoy the following five best short jokes.

Best Short Jokes

1. Did you hear about the Mexican train killer? He had locomotives.


2. How does NASA organize their company parties? They planet.


3. Pampered cows produce spoiled milk.


4. Learn sign language, it’s very handy.


5. I started a band called 999 Megabytes — we haven’t gotten a gig yet.

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Best Short Jokes
Best Short Jokes 1
Best Short Jokes 2
Best Short Jokes 3
Best Short Jokes 4


Pampered cows produce spoiled milk

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Short Classroom Jokes

Here are my collection (which will be updated regularly) of the best short jokes for the classroom. These are kid friendly jokes that even their teachers will find funny! Should, you have a joke to share, why not leave it in the comment section (below) Enjoy and I hope you have a few LOL's!

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TEACHER: Now, Brian, tell me frankly, do you say prayers before eating?
BRIAN: No sir, I don’t have to, my Mom is a good cook.

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TEACHER: Brian, why do you always get so dirty?
BRIAN: Well, I’m a lot closer to the ground than you are.

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TEACHER: Brian, why are you doing your math multiplication on the floor?
BRIAN: You told me to do it without using tables.

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TEACHER: George Washington not only chopped down his father’s cherry tree, but also admitted it. Now, Brian, do you know why his father didn’t punish him?
BRIAN: Because George still had the axe in his hand.

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TEACHER: Kelly, name one important thing we have today that we didn’t have ten years ago.
KELLY: Me!

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TEACHER: Brian, what do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are no longer interested?
BRIAN: A teacher.

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TEACHER: Brian, how do you spell ‘crocodile?’
BRIAN: K-R-O-K-O-D-I-A-L’
TEACHER: No, that’s wrong
BRIAN: Maybe it is wrong, but you asked me how I spell it.

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TEACHER: Kelly, go to the map and find North America
KELLY: Here it is.
TEACHER: Correct. Now class, who discovered America?
CLASS: Kelly.

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TEACHER: Brian, your composition on ‘My Dog’ Is exactly the same as your brother’s. Did you copy his?
BRIAN: No, sir. It’s the same dog.

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TEACHER: Kelly, give me a sentence starting with ‘I.’
KELLY: I is..
TEACHER: No, Kelly…… Always say, ‘I am.’
KELLY: All right…; ‘I am the ninth letter of the alphabet.’

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TEACHER: Brian, what is the chemical formula for water?
BRIAN: H I J K L M N O.
TEACHER: What are you talking about?
BRIAN: Yesterday you said it’s H to O.

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