Today's Best Short Jokes 5

Cross Eyed Teacher
Here is today's selection for the top 10 best short jokes! Hope you enjoy them and get a laugh!

1. A young blonde woman is distraught because she fears her husband is having an affair, so she goes to a gun shop and buys a handgun.
   
   The next day she comes home to find her husband in bed with a beautiful redhead.
   
   She grabs the gun and holds it to her own head.
   
   The husband jumps out of bed, begging and pleading with her not to shoot herself.
   
   Hysterically the blonde responds to the husband, "Shut up...you're next!"


2. Q: What did the man say to the wall?
   A: One more crack like that and I'll plaster ya!


3. Q: What did one elevator say to the other elevator?
   A: I think I'm coming down with something!


4. Q: Did you hear about the calendar thief?
   A: He got 12 months; they say his days are numbered


5. Q: Why did the blonde bring lipstick and eye shadow to school?
   A: She got ready for a make-up exam!


6. Q: How do spiders communicate?
   A: Through the World Wide Web.


7. Silence is golden, Duct tape is silver


8. Q: Why can't your nose be 12 inches long?
   A: Because then it would be a foot!


9. Q: Why are pirates called pirates?
   A: Cause they arrrrr.


10. Q: Why did the cross-eyed teacher lose her job?
    A: Because she couldn't control her pupils?

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